Lesson11 Not guilty

Going through the Customs is a tiresome business. The strangest thing about it is that really honest people are often made to feel guilty. The hardened professional smuggler, on the other hand, is never troubled by such feelings, even if he has five hundred gold watches hidden in his suitcase. When I returned from abroad recently, a particularly officious young Customs Officer clearly regarded me as a smuggler.
'Have you anything to declare?' he asked, looking me in the eye.
'No,' I answered confidently.
'Would you mind unlocking this suitcase please ?'
'Not at all,' I answered.
The Officer went through the case with great care. All the things I had packed so carefully were soon in a dreadful mess. I felt sure I would never be able to close the case again. Suddenly, I saw the Officer's face light up. He had spotted a tiny bottle at the bottom of my case and he pounced on it with delight.
'Perfume, eh?' he asked sarcastically. 'You should have declared that.' Perfume is not exempt from import duty.'
'But it isn't perfume,' I said.' It's hair-oil.' Then I added with a smile,' It's a strange mixture I make myself.' As I expected, he did not believe me.
'Try it!' I said encouragingly.
The Officer unscrewed the cap and put the bottle to his nostrils. He was greeted by an unpleasant smell which convinced him that I was telling the truth. A few minutes later, I was able to hurry away with precious chalk-marks on my baggage.
 现在的海关官员往往相当宽容。但是，当你通过绿色通道，没有任何东西需要申报时，他们仍可以拦住你。甚至是最诚实的人也常弄得觉得有罪似的，而老练的职业走私犯却使手提箱里藏着500只金表，却也处之泰然。最近一次，我也出国归来，碰上一位特别好管闲事的年轻海关官员，他显然把我当成走私犯。
“您有什么需要申报的吗？”他直盯着我的眼睛问。
“没有。”我自信地回答说。
“请打开这只手提箱好吗？”
“好的。”我回答说。
那位官员十分仔细地把箱子检查了一遍。所有细心包装好的东西一会儿工夫就乱成一团。我相信那箱子再也关不上了。突然，我看到官员脸上露出了得意的神色。他在我的箱底发现了一只小瓶，高兴地一把抓了起来。
“香水，嗯？”他讥讽地说道，“你刚才应该申报，香水要上进口税的。”
“不，这不是香水，”我说，“是发胶。”接着我脸带微笑补充说：“这是一种我自己配制的奇特的混合物。”
“你就闻一闻吧！”我催促说。
海关官员拧开瓶盖，把瓶子放到鼻子底下。一股怪味袭来，使他相信了我说的真话。几分钟后，我终于被放行，手提划着宝贵的粉笔记号的行李，匆匆离去。
 
Lesson12 Life on a desert island
Most of us have formed an unrealistic picture of life on a desert island. We sometimes imagine a desert island to be a sort of paradise where the sun always shines. Life there is simple and good.
Ripe fruit falls from the trees and you never have to work. The other side of the picture is quite the opposite. Life on a desert island is wretched. You either starve to death or live like Robinson Crusoe, waiting for a boat which never comes. Perhaps there is an element of truth in both these pictures, but few of us have had the opportunity to find out.
Two men who recently spent five days on a coral island wished they had stayed there longer. They were taking a badly damaged boat from the Virgin Islands to Miami to have it repaired. During the journey, their boat began to sink. They quickly loaded a small rubber dinghy with food, matches, and tins of beer and rowed for a few miles across the Caribbean until they arrived at a tiny coral island. There were hardly any trees on the island and there was no water, but this did not prove to be a problem. The men collected rain-water in the rubber dinghy. As they had brought a spear gun with them, they had plenty to eat. They caught lobster and fish every day, and, as one of them put it 'ate like kings'. When a passing tanker rescued them five days later, both men were genuinely sorry that they had to leave.
我们许多人对于荒岛生活有一种不切实际的想法。我们有时想象荒岛是阳光终日普照的天堂。在那里，生活简单又美好。成熟的水果从树上掉下来，人们根本无需劳动。另一种想法恰恰相反，认为荒岛生活很可怕，要么饿死，要么像鲁滨孙那样，天天盼船来，却总没见船影。也许，这两种都像都有可信之处。但很少有人能有机会去弄个究竟。
最近有两个人在一座珊瑚岛上呆了5天，他们真希望在那儿再多呆一些日子。他们驾着一条严重损坏的小船从维尔京群岛阿密修理。途中，船开始下沉，他们迅速把食物、火柴、罐装啤酒往一只救生筏上装。然后在加勒比海上划行了几英里，到了一座珊瑚岛上。岛上几乎没有一颗树，也没有淡水，但这不算什么问题。他们用像皮艇蓄积雨水。由于他们随身带了一支捕鱼枪，因此，吃饭不愁。他们天天捕捉龙虾和鱼，正如其中一位所说，吃得“像国王一样好”。5天后，一条油轮从那儿路过，搭救了他们。这二位不得不离开那个荒岛时，还真的感到遗憾呢！
 
Lesson13 It’s only me
After her husband had gone to work, Mrs Richards sent her children to school and went upstairs to her bedroom. She was too excited to do any housework that morning, for in the evening she would be going to a fancy dress party with her husband. She intended to dress up as a ghost and as she had made her costume the night before, she was impatient to try it on. Though the costume consisted only of a sheet, it was very effective. After putting it on, Mrs Richards went downstairs. She wanted to find out whether it would be comfortable to wear.
Just as Mrs Richards was entering the dining-room, there was a knock on the front door. She knew that it must be the baker. She had told him to come straight in if ever she failed to open the door and to leave the bread on the kitchen table. Not wanting to frighten the poor man, Mrs Richards quickly hid in the small store-room under the stairs. She heard the front door open and heavy footsteps in the hall. Suddenly the door of the store-room was opened and a man entered. Mrs Richards realized that it must be the man from the Electricity Board who had come to read the meter. She tried to explain the situation, saying' It's only me', but it was too late. The man let out a cry and jumped back several paces. When Mrs Richards walked towards him, he fled, slamming the door behind him.
理查兹夫人等丈夫上班走后，把孩子送去上学，然后来到楼上自己的卧室。那天上午，她兴奋得什么家务活都不想做，因为晚上她要同丈夫一起参加一个化装舞会。她打算装扮成鬼的模样。头天晚上她已把化装服做好，这时她急于想试试。尽管化装服仅由一个被单制成，却十分逼真。理查兹夫人穿上化装服后下了楼，想看穿起来是否舒服。
理查兹夫人刚刚走进餐厅，前门就传来敲门声。她知道来了一定面包师。她曾告诉过面包师，如果她不去开门，他可直接进门，把面包放在厨房的桌上。理查兹夫人不想吓唬这个可怜人，便赶紧躲到了楼梯下的小储藏室里。她听见前门被打开，走廊里响起重重的脚步声。突然贮藏门开了，一个男人走了进来。理查兹夫人这才想到一定是供电局来人查电表了。她说了声“是我，别怕！”然后想进行一番解释，但已来不及了。那人大叫了一声，惊退了几步。理查兹夫人朝他走去，只见他“砰”的一声关上门逃走了。