当前位置:英美者>>游学英美>>出国考试>>雅思>>浏览文章    

雅思9分作文例文及点评

2011年09月18日  所属:雅思  来源:中国教育在线  作者:新东方在线

原文标题:雅思写作范文:老外的9分例文及点评。

  下面这篇在2004年考过两次,内容比较难写,很多考生都构思不出内容,因此,我请我的美国朋友按照雅思作文的套路写了篇范文,大家可以学习一下里面的语言和内容。

  Unlike most countries, the police in the United Kingdom do not normally carry guns. Some people think it leaves the citizens unprotected, while others believe that this practice reduces the overall violence in society. Discuss both views and use your own experience and evidence.

  Unlike most countries, the police in the United Kingdom do not normally carry guns. Some people think it leaves citizens unprotected, while others believe that this practi c e reduces the overall violence in society. Police having guns however is an issue secondary to criminals having guns. (45words)

  结构分析:2+1模式,最后一句为主题句,明确地表达了自己的观点。但是,前两句的问题很严重,即照抄了题目。(这可能是我和老外没有沟通好,在他所写的所有例文中都出现了类似的情况,大家千万不要学!!!)

  Because criminals usually have access to guns, police officers need them in order to control crime. If police in the U.K. are able to go without guns and not have crime getting completely out of control then they have already set a fine example that other countries should follow. The fact that they are able to do this is an indication of their ability to control the flow of guns to the general populace and this makes citizens safer than anything else. To a civilian, taking guns away from criminals is more important than giving them to police. (98words)

  For places that are not able to, or are unwilling to control this availability of guns to criminals, police have no choice. Countries with weak or ineffective gun laws, or countries bordering such countries, like Mexico which has strong gun laws, but virtually no way to prevent them from being smuggled over the border from the U.S., need a police force that is not only armed, but is armed better than the criminals. This ‘domestic arms race’ is the fate of any country that does not realize that civilians have no need of being armed and should have no access to weapons whatsoever.(103words)

  The root of the problem is embarrassingly corrupt governments and ineffective half-measures taken to control the circulation of guns, which allows criminals to easily come into possession of guns. Nations around the world should hope to someday reach the point where their police force can afford not to carry guns and still be effective.


雅思 最新资讯
· 雅思9分作文例文及点评
· 雅思写作中常见问题错误汇总
· 在中国雅思考生已经突破30万
· 雅思增设兰州考点 在美国受广泛认可
· 2010年5月29日雅思IELTS写作回顾
· 2010年5月22日雅思写作真题
· 2010年5月15日雅思写作真题
· 2010年5月8日雅思写作真题
· 2010年下半年雅思考试命题趋势
· 2010年4月17日雅思考试大连考点考生注意

英美者 最新资讯
· 雅思9分作文例文及点评
· 雅思写作中常见问题错误汇总
· 在中国雅思考生已经突破30万
· 雅思增设兰州考点 在美国受广泛认可
· 2012年考研报名时间公布、复试一区二区新变化
· Amazon:book rental service (双语新闻、英语新
· 澳新护照承认第三种性别(英语新闻报道双语对照阅
· Socialising keeps you slim(双语新闻)
· 世界各国竞争力排行:瑞士第一,中国第26(双语英语
· 中秋节的来历、中秋节的简介(英语介绍)
· 英语六级考试写作模板:图表作文框架
Amazon:book rental servi
澳新护照承认第三种性别(
Socialising keeps you sl
离2012伦敦奥运还有一年(